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Sliding Polls: Two Vastly Different First Days in Office

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11:45 AM: Sweep up remnants of glass ceiling

The Second City’s Off-Base Best Wishes for Our Beloved Chicago Cubs

The Second City’s Off-Base Best Wishes for Our Beloved Chicago Cubs

Best wishes, Cubbies. Either way, Chicago burns!

Potential Epitaphs for the Above-Average Millennial (Which, Duh, Is Every Millennial)

Potential Epitaphs for the Above-Average Millennial (Which, Duh, Is Every Millennial)

"Here Lies Alyssa: Backpacked Through Europe, Parents Have to Pay Back Her Student Loans"

How to Maintain Your Sanity for the Last Few Days of this Election

How to Maintain Your Sanity for the Last Few Days of this Election

Buy all the canned vegetables and meat you can afford, and get down in the basement. NOW.

The Rules of Improv Can Actually Help You Deal with Donald Trump

The Rules of Improv Can Actually Help You Deal with Donald Trump

Remember, we all have the power to affect what’s happening and edit the scene.

An Invitation to Paul Ryan's Super Sad Election Night Party

An Invitation to Paul Ryan's Super Sad Election Night Party

I’ve shown you anything this election season, it’s that I never let my principles get in the way of a raging party.